Toan Voa Voa

(New Year)

 Tratra toan! 

That is how everyone will greet you here for the entire week. It's pronounced like "cha-cha tone" and is usually accompanied by three kisses. So this week...ahh, where to start. This e-mail goes out to a mixed audience so for some of you, this will be old news and for some of you new news. This week has been a definite rollercoaster. I'll just cut to the quick. On thursday, the 31st I recieved a call from President Adams toward the end of the day during which he told me that I should skpe call my family because there was some serious news about my Grandmother's health. I'll admit, my blood ran cold. If the mission President is calling you and then telling you to call your family it can only be bad news. I imagined that my family would tell me some really bad news, that my Grandmother had cancer and was going to be sick for a long time and undergoing chemotherapy. Unfortunately, the news was even worse than that. My Grandmother did have cancer but it had already progressed to stage 4 and had spread all throughout her body. The Doctors estimated about two months left for her. I think for that evening my world slightly seemed to shatter - because I felt like I was in some surreal movie. I had never experienced such intense grief as that moment. I had seen it in movies millions of times but had never yet myself lost someone close to me or had a family member with a fatal diagnosis. 

However, never before in my life have I had such a strong testimony of the Plan of Salvation. During the whole moment, I never once thought "Why is this happening to us?" or "How will we ever be able to move on past this trial?" Because I too - like the late Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin, believe with all my heart that Sunday Will Come. That there WILL be another day when we will ALL reunite. I know that seeing any of our deceased family and friends is not a question of IF but of WHEN. And in the timeline of God, that when is oh so short. It is like a mission - it seems and often feels SO long but in the end, it will seem to us and our Heavenly Parents that it passed in the blink of an eye. So too will our separation seem like the blink of a heavenly eye, once we have a heavenly perspective. Oh the time can seem so lonely and spread out before us, but those we have lost are always there. They are just on the other side of the veil and if we could but for one moment pull it back, we would realize they were at our sides and not feel alone. I know that Christ was the first fruits of them that slept. And Because and Through Him, ALL men will rise again. And thanks to the blessings and ordinances of the gospel, when we rise, we will be sealed to each other - to live in eternal family units with our loved ones forever. Without fear of pain, death or sadness again. And what seems like a beautiful fairy  tale to many people, is real to me. I feel the truth in every bone in my body and have devoted the last 16 months of my life preaching this truth. As sure as Friday, and the end for each of us will come - so too will Sunday. And that day will be glorious. And it will be bright. And all will be well. I see it as though it will happen tomorrow because of the assurrance that I have that it WILL happen. How blessed are we that this is our future - that this is the truth - this is each of our destinies. To rise again. Glorious and perfect and full of joy. 

I do not question why this trial has come into our lives at this moment. It is the Lord's plan. Plus, I already have my personal answer. One of the sisters in the house in La Reunion always questioned why one of my companions hadn't been translated yet, because according to her, the Lord translates people once they become perfect (and she couldn't find a flaw in my beloved Sister Isham, none of us could). Well, if it's true that the Lord doesn't leave perfectly righteous people on the earth very long (Moses, Alma the younger etc) then I suppose that's the reason it's Grandma's time to leave. She's spent her whole life converting herself to the Lord and preparing and changing herself to reflect our Savior and the Lord just doesn't leave  perfectly righteous people on the earth. It's not exactly translation but the Lord has His many ways. 

In light of this new news, it seems likely that I am going to go home with the transfer before my date (February 4) instead of after (March 18) so that I can go see and then live with/take care of my Grandparents for a couple of months.  I still need to talk to Pres Adams about leaving early but I feel really good about coming home four weeks early. I feel like I would be fulfilling another mission to the Lord to be able to serve my family. So I feel like in some ways - as awful as this timing is - it also is proof of the Lord's timing. That I can be in the situation where I won't have obligations like the rest of my family - no one else can fulfill the job that I will when I go home - so I feel like that is proof of the Lord's hand and timing in our lives. I don't know, I could write about all the emotions and thoughts from this week but I will be able to talk to everyone in person in ony four weeks(!)  That seems crazy that my mission will be over so quickly, and it's bittersweet but I'm ready. I feel a super strong purpose in coming home. Anyway, that's my news for the week - the Lord is trying me in EVERY way - put I am putting my trust in Him and believing that I will come out a stronger person and in the end, everything will be alright. 

Love,

Sis Stewart

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

This week - not going to lie - was a tough one. Christmas was a little disappointing and the work was hard BUT talking to the family was of course the best thing ever! And even if one week was hard, we are still blessed by the Lord everyday and lucky to be missionaries! So a big thanks to the family, talking really boosted my spirits and especially your words at the end gave me more determination, enthusiasm, perserverence, you name it. These last few weeks sure have been challenging but I know I'm going to make it and I'm going to be helped and supported by the Lord all the way through. 

So there are not really traditions for Christmas here and not really much celebrating either. BUT *note for Kiari* I did find out that a few kids DID recieve presents - so turns out some of them do that tradition here. Most of the families we visited didn't give gifts but we saw some kids with new toys. We also had a "fetsy" or a christmas party at the church which was super fun. All the different auxiliaries presented something. The youth danced, the relief society sang, there were a few other musical numbers. I pretended to be Mary. We ate cake. It was a smash. And the best part was that after the party they put on the fun music and everyone rushed the dance floor. Like many other cultures, dancing is a BIG thing on Madagascar. Youth, women, and men all danced. They did some traditional dances and lots of just dancing. It was so cool to see - I filmed a lot. Even the littlest kids danced with the group, mimicking what they saw. You could tell it was definitely a part of the culture. Why don't we dance more? 

There is going to be another party for New Years and that one is solely devoted to dancing so I'm sure it's going to be awesome. My companion was so confused by our typical New Year's celebration since it's pretty low key. On her island in Guadeloupe it's a big deal! The whole family comes together and has a big meal and then dances until FOUR in the morning! All of them! Mom, Aunts, Uncles, not just the young teenagers or adults. Dancing is a big thing for them too. When I told her that the only party that most people who aren't highschool/college kids dance at is weddings, she was shocked. We need more dancing in our society I guess.

My health is good. My spirits are good too. I am definitely looking forward to coming home - even if it might change shortly after I get there! But I am also trying to make the most of right now and appreciate every moment the Lord has given me. Thank you everyone for your love, and support. I've spent the last year 2014 serving the Lord and having the most rewarding experience of my life and I am so excited to start a new year and see what the Lord has planned for me. Everyone should go watch the mormon message "Remember Lot's Wife" for the New Year - do it as a belated Christmas present for me. I get inspired everytime I see it. 

Love you All!!

Sister Stewart

Fety Christmas!

So this week went well. It is starting to really get into the swing of summer which also = the rainy season. So it is crazy hot during the day and then about 2 or 3 the clouds start rolling in. At first, like any vahsa "gringo" "foreigner", I was like, why does everyone panic when the clouds come. Like yeah, it's going to rain but in a bit and what's a little bit of rain. Because I mean people will honestly pack up and like go home in a hurry, when the wind starts picking up. And then this week I was answered when it poured almost every single day. And I mean poured. It doesn't rain that hard in the states. Trust me. And when it rains people basically stop leaving the house. Members and investigators won't come to activities because they will tell us "it was raining so you know" and at this point, I am sort of like "Ok, sure, I know" One of these days I was caught without my umbrella. SO wet. My dress was soaked through. And each step felt like I was walking in puddles even when the ground was dry - because the water had pooled in my shoes. Lucky I have two pair now. I rotate. It takes about a day for them to dry so it's perfect. 

Other interesting news. As sister A and I were walking around looking for people to contact and houses to knock we came across a big play field. And we were so suprised by what we saw. People playing rugby. But not just any people. Women too. And I'm talking tackle rugby. These women were moms, and often had a lot of extra weight. But there they were sprinting down the field and tossing the ball back and forth. And they were playing with men. Not old men. But young 20 something year olds, who were tackling the women. And the women were doing pretty well. Crazy right? Who would've known? Don't worry, I filmed some of it. 

Well I don't have much more time. One last funny thing. The ward members asked me if I would stand as Mary while they read the Christmas story. Why? Because I am the most "fotsy fotsy" person in the ward and Mary is described as being "fair and white" in the Book of Mormon. Hahah True Story. 

Love you ALL,

Sr Stewart

We are so close to Christmas!

Hello all,

First, I am healthy! Yay! So no need to worry. Yes the Bubonic Plague does break out every year in Madagascar and there are about 800 cases or something. But no I do not have it nor am I likely to ever catch it. We have preventitive medicine that they make us take every single day so don't fret. 

This was a pretty rough week again...drama with the sisters. This time I simply don't want to go into it. I'm hoping that Christmas and the spirit of Christ will bring love and harmony into our home. Things with Solo and Sylvie have also taken a turn for the worst because Sylvie started drinking again. Also the process to get them legally married is going to be really tricky because Sylvie doesn't have any form of birth certificate. She also can't remember/doesn't know the full name of her two parents - which is the typical way that they look up to find a birth certificate. So...it is going to be a process.

In other news, this family we have been teaching just shot off like a rocket. This couple Andrea and Meldaze have three daughters and we have been teaching them for 3 or 4 lessons. The husband Meldaze has been super sick because he had surgery on his liver and still is undergoing treatment for that. During most of this time he hasn't been able to leave his bed and even simple actions like zipping up his jacket are a struggle. Most of the lessons he just sits there not really participating or moving. But the other week when we taught about Joseph Smith, we asked them "Would it be important to have a living prophet?" The wife was like um, I don't know. But then all of a sudden, Meldaze looked up and was like "That would be so important! We really need prophets and that would be a really big deal!" And then he added some more stuff about how essential prophets are. Sr Amoussouga and I were flabbergasted - we didn't even realize he was listening! And then ever since then, they have gotten really serious about our teachings. They listen intently and do their homework - read the verses or chapters we leave them. This week, we offered to have some members give Meldaze a blessing because he is still really sick. Then Andrea came to a baptism on Saturday. And the whole family came to church on Sunday - Meldaze included!! Because now he is healthy enough to leave the house. And at then end they were asking what they needed to do to be baptized and how long before they could! They were asking members and US that question! When normally it's us asking our investigators! It is so amazing! Because you can see how they have tuned in to the message of the gospel. At the beginning they were passively listening but now they are hungering for the knowledge and light themselves! What an incredible blessing. They have set a date for the 7th of March.

As for skyping! I believe that the time difference is now 11 hours right? Because I am in Mada, I will just be skyping from a cyber cafe...so it might be interesting aka noisy or bad connection. I think most likely I will need to skype you in the morning your time because 7pm your time is 6am my time - which is too early for me and anything later than that will be too late for you. Does that make sense? Unless if it works with you, we could skype 9pm your time and 8am my time. So tell me if you want to do it the morning of the 24th or 25th and I can probably make it work either days. Probably around 7am your time or 6pm my time. I know morning isn't super convenient but I figure it is better than 9 in the evening your time. Let me know what you want to do next week because that is the last week before Christmas!

Love you all,

Sr Stewart

full of gratitude

 Sorry for those of you who were looking for my letter yesterday. I was sick. But am better now so no worries. So another huge blessing for this week is Sylvie and Solo again! Seriously, every week it is just another blessing to work with them. This week they brough lots of their family members to church! We showed up to walk them to church and the grandma, nephew and several little kids were there all excited to go to church! So we walked with all of them up to church. The whole time I just kept thinking about the scripture in Matthiew "Does a man light a candle and hide it under a bushel? No, but upon a chandlier and it gives light unto all those that are in the house" Sylvie and Solo have been recieving more and more of the gospel light each week and now they are sharing it with their family and the light is being seen to all those that are "in the house". I love that. You can actually SEE a change in them and their lives. This week Solo painted their house. It used to be just plain wood. Now it is green and blue and white and so pretty. He wrote scripture verses above the doorframe too.  They put up Christmas decorations in their house. The whole house is starting to have a different spirit. The two of them are getting along better. And all this because of the restored gospel. They already believed in God. They already prayed everyday. But there is something MORE and there is something DIFFERENT with the gospel we preach. It is restored - It is FULL and it changes people and their lives. Sylvie doesn't drink anymore. They are working really hard to get legally married in the next couple of weeks. Miracles are happening - and I get to be here to witness it. 

I don't really have a lot of time. But we also had Zone Conference this week and one of the things we talked about was desire. How we will be rewarded according to our desires. And also how at that last day we will have a perfect knowledge of our works - and our guilt. So now is the time to cultivate the right desires. It is not enough for us just not to do bad things but we must DESIRE good. We must desire to be obedient. We must sacrifice with wholeness of heart. Whoa. Pretty difficult right. Christ has said that to truly be His disciple we need to sacrifice all that we have. Often that sacrifice is actually just one of ourselves. Sacrificing our sins and our disobedience. Sacrificing our will to be aligned with His. Think about it a little this weeek.

Love you all,

Sister Stewart

Olana *Problems*

Salame,

Don't confuse this word with olona, because that means people. Tricky the difference that one letter can make right? So the title of this e-mail is because I don't know the malagasy word for drama, and that word describes our week. So in a nutshell....Sr Amoussouga and I were called to be Sister Training Leaders. You might not think this is new news since that was my calling before however right before the transfer President told me that the calling might change to another sister. So up until this Monday I wasn't sure if I still was or if he was going to call another sister. Unfortunately the calling/transition hasn't gone over as smooth as hoped for. Sr Amoussouga and I tried to assume our new roles and do a set of exchanges this week. After one hour the other sister came home and locked herself in her room refusing to go out again. So that led to this meeting with President and all the other sisters - all 8 of us in the mission. And that was the worst meeting of my entire life. I don't want to go into details but needless to say there was a lot of not positive commentary made about us in the new Sister Training Leader position. Then after all of this was aired out that night Sr Amoussouga and I had to go around and try and sort it all out. Which mostly consisted of apologizing to everyone for anything and everything and whatever it was that people had had a problem with. It wasn't the most fun of activities. But it is teaching us to be super humble because someone has to bite the bullet and just say "ok fine, we will take the blame for everything because we just want to work this out and for everyone to move on and work together" And that's essentially what we did. But as Sr Amoussouga said, what doesn't kill us will make us stronger. And all these experiences are just shaping us to be better. She is super cool and totally has the right attitude if you noticed. 

So the best thing about this week is that we got close and unified this week because we have had to deal with all of this (and all the girls) together, with only each other. That is a huge blessing - I definitely couldn't have done it alone. Another cool thing about Sr Amoussouga is that she is quadrilingual. Her native language is French but she speaks English and Spanish fluently too and now is working on Malagasy. So we are working on developing our three languages together: French, English and Malagasy. We even fight about which days we are going to speak what language because I am always pulling for French and her for English! 

Everything has been sorted at the house and it's cool. It actually is a super cool experience living among so many different cultures. We have sisters from France, Guadeloupe, Mozambique, Tahiti, Ghana and Madagascar - so you can imagine all the culture they bring! They decided a good way to celebrate Thanksgiving (well none of them celebrate it but they used it as an excuse) was to slaughter a chicken. In our apt. So we all bought a live chicken and then killed it for our Thanksgiving dinner. I did not participate but forced myself to watch because I decided I needed to know where my food came from. Of course the Africans were super mahay (muh-hi) *knowledgeable* about killing and cleaning and cooking the chicken. I contributed green beans and mashed potatoes. And then we had a Thanksgiving dinner in Madagascar last night. One day I will send pictures - when I figure out how...

In super positive news: Sylvie and Solo are progressing along really well and they all came to church again!!

Love you all!

Sister Stewart

Tsara Be Madagascar! Super Awesome Madagascar!

Salame,

The title might sound funny but you have to remember that there is no "to be" verb in malagasy. All my life I thought it was the most important verb for any language and then here is malagasy, proving me wrong and showing that maybe no one needs to use to be verbs.

So this week...where to start? First off. Yes I am the only American sister in all of Madagascar. Crazy right? Basically all of the girls are straight out of Africa - I'll explain. There are only 8 sister missionaries in all of Mada. Two (Sr Ramiaramana and Sr Sitraponahy) are from Madagascar, Antsirabe - the country town I travelled to that is 4 hours from Tana. Sr Guilamba is from Mozambique. Sr Kassah is from Ghana. Sr Teuira is from Tahiti. Sr Wenyi grew up in France but her parents are both from Congo. Sr Amoussouga (my companion) is from Guadaloupe. That's an island in the Caribbean. So I'm the only American and fotsy kely (a bit white) sister in Mada. The reason I say white is because to the sisters and people of Madagascar I am pretty white - at best they will call me metisse which means mixed. It's so funny because all my life people have been telling me the opposite - that I'm black - then I go to Africa and I'm white! It's all about perspective. But I am learning SO MUCH about other cultures. I mean like food, life style and hair. I'm learning a lot about hair. There is a lot of braiding that goes on. I have decided to stick to my own real hair.........for now, hahaha. 

Update on Sylvie and Solo: This was a rough week. Sylvie is really really struggling with alcohol. In fact half of the week she was gone from the house because she just got so drunk she left and didn't come back for days. Luckily by the end of the week things got a lot better and calmed down. We were able to talk to Sylvie sober and really discuss how we can help her with her addiction. Solo on the other hand is taking off - he is spiritually flying. He reads the Book of Mormon like crazy and this week HE asked US if he could be baptized!! There are a few obstacles though. The biggest one is that they need to be vita soratra - legally married - which is tough here because it takes money and paperwork. But Solo is super determined and said he wants to get baptized for Christmas as a way to really show Christ during HIS season that Solo wanted to follow Him. Wow. Beautiful. This man is so ready. And the WHOLE family came to church!! Which was a first for Sylvie. I am so happy I get to be a part of their journey into the gospel, even if it is hard and sticky and full of big obstacles - it is such a blessing. 

Alright well I absolutely love my mission. I seriously love Madagascar - even as smelly and crazy and dirty as it is. It's not because we have like thousands of prepared people or a thousand baptism dates - we were dodged 16 times last week - no joke I just counted. But no big deal because I LOVE my mission. So a couple of weeks ago dad sent me the transcript of this father's blessing he gave me before my mission and it was straight up personal revelation. This is what I wrote to President about it:

 

So I already talked to you a bit last week but basically I have had a complete shift in attitude. Long story short my father sent me the transcript of the father's blessing he gave me before I left on my mission and in reading it I had this spiritual confirmation that everything is working out as it is supposed to. I realized - really realized on a personal level not just a doctrinal level - that Heavenly Father really does know the beginning from the end and He has a plan for it all. Even before my mission I was blessed and given advice that applies to now and earlier on my mission. Heavenly Father knows exactly what's going on and where I am now (including trials and difficulties) is where I'm supposed to be. I'm supposed to struggle with the language - Heavenly Father knew that - He planned for that but it is all for a wise purpose. I know everything is going to work out and this week proved that. 

It was basically a patriarchal blessing for my mission, it talked about all my difficulties and struggles and also what the Lord was going to ask of me. He even blessed me to feel help from the Lord in speaking Malagasy --- before anyone even knew I was going to be speaking Malagasy. In short it proved to me that the Lord has had a plan since the very beginning and He knows the big picture. And reading my blessing helped me see it too - the big picture. And ever since then, my vision has been cleared and I just feel so much light and clarity and GOODNESS in my life and my mission. I don't think I've ever been this happy. Which is crazy considering how tricky and hard some of these experiences are. But it's true. I don't really want to go home right now - or ever and I understand why everyone talks about being so happy in their missions. There is so much light and happiness that FLOODS your life when you live the gospel of Jesus Christ. And the more sacrifices you make, and the more you align yourself to be exactly obedient the more light and joy you recieve. I know that to be true - because I've seen that in my life!

Love you all! Can't wait to talk on Christmas!

Sis Stewart